Vacation

I took a part of my vacation from work this week. I got alot done. I am not having too much trouble out of the schiz this week, so far. Mel doesn't have Cancer for now anyway. It'll be three more years before we know again. But it looked good.

I am now going to go to bed and just lay there. Maybe sleep, maybe not. Where ever my vacation takes me is where I am going to go. Just staying at home with know time line on anything. I kinda have a headache but I am sure it is because I was out in the sun and heat most of the day. Feels good to be outdoors. Good night...

Oh, I did watch a movie tonight named "Troy". It was great but afterwards I felt like my brain was "linked" to Brad Pitt..who does show his buttocks in the movie..wheeeeweee!!! That is about the only episode of the schiz that I had...and wouldn't you know it...I had to use the restroom while he linked...gross!!! Mostly, though, when I watch a movie that I relly get into, I always feel like I am getting "brain-links" from the actors in the movie and we discuss the movie. Just another part of the schizophrenia.

I would also like to say that this site has been up for a year now. This month marks a year of my schizophrenic and mental illness blog. I am excited even though no one else has joined...I still believe that it is a good idea. I have two support groups that I go to every now and then. One of them is schizophrenia.com and the other is support4hope.com. The first one is only for schizophrenics but the second one is for ALL mental illnesses. Schizophreia.com is more to let you speak your mind as long as you don't try to get other people to stop taking their medicines. That's a "no-no"! And support4hope.com will not let you discuss suicide or feelings of suicide. Each one has it's purpose for me. But lately, I have been trying to live WITH the paranoid schizophrenia, instead of LIVING it. which means the schizophrenia is not on my mind all the time anymore...or the issues that it causes with me. It is more like living with a disease that is treatable...you live your life AROUND it and with it. You don't make the disease and every part of it the only thing you think about anymore. I will not let it disable me!!! I can't live my life afraid of everything like some people do. Don't get me wrong...other schizophrenics can't help it...but I think my "common sense" is over powering my schizophrenia. Or hell, the medicine just might be working better since the psychiatrist upped my dosage. I reallly have to admit that to myself. But common sense has a lot to do with the schiz not disabling me completely.

Now, since I am on the schiz subject, my mind is now trying to tell me that my voices caused this headache. That they (the voices but to me they are people) are trying to make me sick on my vacation. But I reallly think I was out in the sun too much today. So now, I am going to go lay down....