I can't take it anymore

I feel like I am going to break or something. The phone rang this morning...it was my son's aunt's number on the caller ID. I am afraid to return the phone call. I think they wanna tell me that Cory ran away again. I am petrified. But it's more then the phone...I am feeling this way EVERY single morning. I am having these horrible panic attacks every day now. I think it is the new Paxil. I was on Paxil CR but because they have been having problems and had to recall the drug...the doctor put me on regular Paxil. I didn't think it would be much different but all these panic attacks started about the same time that the new Paxil would've gotten into my system.
It takes me the longest time to return to normal after these attacks...I feel like I can't breathe. It is like someone slipped me a tablespoon of pure fear. The mornings I was having ...so relaxed and so quiet have begun to be the scariest thing in the world to go through. I can talk to my therapist about it on Tuesday but I don't know what else to do. I stay so nervous and I smoke so much more. I "hear" alot more but I can tell it is just my brain that is making the voices up...and not the conspiracy to drive me crazy. I use to believe that people were trying to drive me literally crazy because they thought if I went nuts then they wouldn't. The television started talking directly to me again last night...I had to roll over and think about other stuff so that I wouldn't hear the television. Something is going wrong with me. The Geodon usually takes care of things like "the conspiracy" and the television talking to me, the bathroom paranoia, but I still hear voices..but since it is just babbling I don't pay any attention to them. But lately, the last week or two, the voices seem to make sense again and they try to make me "feel" their pain.
The doctor told me once that added stress can cause the schizophrenia to "act up" again... like it use to. And the only thing I can think that is added stress is the fact that my son talks about running away alot now..but he told me where. And the added responsibility of sharing a bank account with my husband. We usually have our own accounts. I think I am afraid to let him down or something. Plus the added responsibility! It feels like I have a big block sitting on my chest. I don't know what it is.