Dangers

I have all these reactions to this medicine and I have been informed that I probably need a "cocktail". That is when you have to take several different medicines for a problem like my schizophrenia. The side effects to these medications are serious stuff like Diabetes and Blood Infections. It's bad stuff. I have went as high as I will be able to go with the Geodon. The only drug that doesn't make you wanna eat. I am already paranoid about my weight. I also was informed that I should probably draw Disability. The slightest stress puts me into the "voices" and paranoia. (spelling may be wrong). When they increased my Geodon this last time I started having really blurred vision in my right eye and fainting spells. So I will probably be going back to the Doctor today or tomorrow. My work is suffering tremendously because of these appointments. Oh and did I mention the uncontrollable crying episodes every day this week. I can't handle it. I can't handle much more. And Mel is gone. My doctor wants him to quit his job but he can't yet. We need the money. And I really won't let him. He needs this for him> He has been worried about the money for awhile now. And he doesn't have to worry with this job...he makes a lot. I can't quit crying. My therapist is working on that though. And what I meant about Life Isn't Fair was about your situation...Lisa. But I am right behind you ok. Every other day seems like a struggle to just get stuff done that I have to do. But if I lay around I get overly paranoid that maybe I am not breathing right. I feel terrified all the time. But my therapist just called and I have an appointment tomorrow at 3:00 about the bad effects from the increase in Geodon. Am I going to be literally sick with blood infections because of schizophrenia? I am scared to death.